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Debating ...

When I was younger (17-20 years old) I used to love debating any small detail about life. I was inquisitive, aggressive, passionate, and a little cynical. I actually lost a few friends and alienated most of the rest with my antics of taking any small discussion point and picking it to pieces with fact checking and questions.

I don't do that any more. I kind of wish I did ... I feel really unscientific by the fact that there are some things in life that I simply accept. There is even a bit of mumpsimus (willful ignorance) that I hold to now and again. I believe what I do and act the way that I do for personal reasons rather than logical ones. I fully admit that most of my motives are based in personal deductions that aren't always the popular or common reasoning. However, since it is my own personal code I don't feel like people should be too concerned.

I have met a few people recently who are very much like I was years ago. I can honestly empathize with my friends of the past when I am forced to inform them that "no, I don't really care about the minutia of that theory ..." Maybe it is just that I don't enjoy arguing anymore? I admit that even the idea of getting involved in conversations where people trot out pedantic arguments and counter my disagreement with patronizing smiles and condescending tones makes me so very tired.

The sad part is that I still consider myself someone who likes to debate issues ... I just don't like to do it with people who are very passionate anymore. It really makes me sad that I have lost that argumentative part of me. If you had told me I would feel this way now when I was 17 there is no chance I would have believed you.

To grow old is to pass from passion to compassion

~ Albert Camus ~

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